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date/time Thursday, May 28, 2009,10:52 PM
HELL IN A SAUNA ROOM.
okay well.. not really. but it happens in one of those FULLY white rooms (you'd think you were in a psychward) but HERE I AM (: eating salad and barely typing at a normal speed cause every single part of my body is so damn worked out.
I WAS SCREAMING "CHILD LABOUR!!" in my head.. while everyone looked so damn focussed, it made me try to be a LITTLE more competitive.. but i'd give up HAHAHAHA and sit on my yoga mat while everyone was holding their back and bodies up.
okay at first i was like.. "PFT, this shiii is EASYY." but you'll be LUCKY if you make it to the end. seriously hard stuff. i have NEVER in my life sweat THAT much before ever.. EVER.
so yeah, whoever wants to try it for their first time.. HAHA i'll pay you 20 bucks to go through what i did.. 2 hours of yoga in a sauna room.
rr: 8am or 10am saturday. LOL. NAMASTE.
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date/time Wednesday, May 27, 2009,6:26 PM
OTS: temporary insanity.
he did it in the park.
yes, it was pretty tacky.. but the way everything was neatly set up, made it just about perfect as he is to me.
i woke up to my old-school nokia cell phone, which violently disturbed me from a really intense dream that i unfortunately can't remember anymore. I picked up my heavy arm from my bed and reached blindlessly for my phone. "ellooo?" i asked in my half asleep toned voice.
it was him.
i threw a minor tantrum at him explaining about how ungrateful i was, since he'd woken me up from what i think was a really good dream. However, he ignored my whining and told me he had plans for us to meet at the park today at around sunset and not to be late or his plans would be ruined.. totally ignoring the fact that i might have plans before and after sunset. he always had planned out days for just us two, and i loved every one of them. luckily, tonight i had no plans, and i guess.. it was another piece in this puzzle that spelled F A T E. So i got up, wore a yellow scarf with a plain tee, high waisted skirt, office suiting flats, an oversized messenger bag with my ray ban sunglasses and made a hayden braid using the front of my hairline just loose enough to pull a few stands of hair out for messy but clean bangs. I was always precise with what i wore and my physical appearance, even though he told me anything would look fine..men.
Before i left for work, i turned my webcam on for a temporary mirror and redid my makeup.. closely lining brownish gold eyeshadow agains black liquid eyeliner on my top eyelid. I wanted to look perfect all the time for him. I got to the park prior to sunset and scanned the parking lot for him. He was just a few meters away, and when we caught each others eyes, we both smiled. Boy, can he smile. His hazel eyes reflected the sun, making his face so delicate for a strongly built man.
"What do you have planned for today?" He told me to go straight into his chevy and told me we were going for a ride. We were both strangely silent in the car.. i was anxious to find out the where and whats and he looked nervously plain. We got out of his car to a deserted hill, overlooking the water and far away islands. As i found a spot to sit where the sun lay, he brought out a cooler and a blanket for us to share. Another sweet day planned out by him, it was perfect.
We were sitting and staring out into the blue, and i caught him from the corner of my eye, staring at me. "Why are you staring at me?" Something i'd always ask, though i knew what he would say. I found it creepy, yet in a strange way, charming. He responded with a smile and planted a soft kiss that lasted for about 2 seconds. The sun was near the horizon, and everything was set in place.. as he drew his hand into his pocket and pulled out a white velvet case. I unintentionally felt wetness running down my face, that caught the ends of my brought up mouth corners..smiling. Facinated like a small girl, i looked deeply into the shimmering ring, he told me that i could wear sweatpants for the rest of my life.
I now knew why he'd pick this very moment, as i whispered a soft "yes," I just agreed to be married.
"love is a temporary insanity that is cured with marriage."
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date/time Tuesday, May 26, 2009,9:40 PM
tangeled; empty.
you wrap me between a shape hugging blanket, tight enough for me to move around, though restricted. and yet, i still feel incomplete.. when i wake up, and when i fall asleep. if i'm dreaming, wake me up. no nightmare is left wanted, to relive. the blanket has reshaped into a material that doesn't exist, a tight, choking, and literally breath taking embrace has been too imminent for too long. the feeling of help is delayed.. the comfort once untangeled me from my irreversible mixture. something's missing in this impossible recipe.
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date/time 8:43 PM
over-dose.
Boy, I'm feeling like I'm coming down with a case of you. Now it started in my head but it trickled down to my shoes. I feel so weak, so hard to breathe. But it seems to only happen when you leave, boy. Ain't nobody ever had me feeling quite like you do. I'm coming down with a case of you. Trying not to think about you only got me missing you more. And loneliness ain't no cure. Thought I was over about it now. But, no not yet. Pulled the covers up to my head. Now I'm feeling dizzy, and my mouth is dry. With just a thought of you on my mind. It's kinda crazy, what a mess I'm in. I can't believe this is happening. And I can't play it off like we're friends like I used to. No, I can't pretend like I used to.
I'm coming down with a case of you.
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date/time Monday, May 25, 2009,8:23 PM
tiiiiipsyyy.
whether i'm awake, asleep or dreaming..
the only thing that seems to adore running through my head is something so simple, i can't describe.
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date/time 5:09 PM
why do i care?
i don't really know but to highlight " was unconditional," was absolutely necessary.. cause in my (and pretty sure in the majority of others') perspective.. " was unconditional." is n't a correct term in the human-speaking-languages known.
damn, i don't get to get the windbreaker(heartbreaker) until tomorrow after school. No, this does not conclude the specific large amount of materialism that a clairvoyant (or any other) person would see that i have as a characteristic or a whole way of living.. but it DOES clarify that if i want something, i want it bad. real bad. So, i'm going to get it. (: And if i see a medium, kathlene, i'll let you know i got it for you and split it with someone as your belated birthday gift.
Unfortunately, the stupid comparisons on facebook with "who smells better," does not apply to me as 100% anymore as of today. It's summer, so don't go "ew" cause i'm not the only one. :| GG for Dove.
^That was from.. walking around in Bellisfair ALL day. Unfortunately, since i'm saving up for that Nike Windbreaker i didn't get ANYTHING that i tried on which are the following..(wants):
XS? Just a pretty and short summer dress. Add the long necklace, messenger bag, and bright coloured windbreaker or some cardigan.. :( only 18 for this Wet Seal's Colorblock Tulip Dress by ENR. this obviously looks better on the model.. it was REALLY comfortable and it takes me FOREVER to find a nicely fitted and good looking swimsuit that's not 'showy', but it was 58 dollars (just for the top), and mon mere didn't agree to even splitting it with me. Victoria's Secret Ruched Halter Top.My sister made me try this on, and surprisingly.. with such a small bust, it fit me HAH. But the wide shorts made me feel so tiny. It was 25 bucks, really good compared to what it would be here in Canada. Wet Seal's Ruffle Front Romper by Blue Asphalt.So.. i'm going to go take a shower, and finish a few more chapters of "Love The One You're With by Emily Griffin," Since "Tweak: Growing up on Methamphetamines by Nic Sheff" got boring. And then watch The Curious Case of Benjamin Button since it's apparently a good movie (plus Brad Pitt is in it), and search up "Running Scared." (: I almost beat my streak of going out for more than 2 days in the school year =[
p.s. i woke up to a really good textmessage this morning.
p.p.s. i wanted to see selena gomez today :(
peace, love & lmfao.
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date/time Sunday, May 24, 2009,9:22 PM
coscia.
sounds pretty, doesn't it? i've come up with a new name for my FUTURE-daughter. i'll probably forget about it anyway.. but i'll forever stay in love with the name 'Jacerie' of which i don't know how i came up with. Just add Valentino/a at the end, and SHOOT, that girl/guy will be so beautiful to me. Coscia Riley? haha i don't know. laaaaaaaaaaame.
i just hope i'm not like going to go anywhere.. with my ____ thinking
"it scares me that i'm starting to forget you. since you've left, i've missed you. and if you come back, i never want to see you again."
no running away. i know i'm too young to make myself those kind of promises.. but it's better to start now then to forget and remember after i've commited the "shouldn't-be's".
frick, my mind wanders into places that should be left alone during this age faze. :$
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date/time 9:05 PM
keep dreaming.
another really good week (: except.. the book i was waiting for (The Awakening Sequel) WAS A BIGASS disappointment. But i got back into the attempt-to-read a lot mode, which is a good thing on my behalf. [: i finally got to go out yesterday for the first time in maybe 2-3 months? Like always, Kathlene's birthdays are 1. BIG 2. FULL 3. HELLA FUN.. and all the favourites went. oh and a bonus ? .. NO DRAMA. (which was a +) and everyone dressed so nicely. [: props to mikaelas mom and grandma who gave her that vintage belt and gossipgirl skirt. HAHA. After soaking up the sun, watching UFC, taking billions of pictures, laughing too hard, da singing(thank you!), and beatboxing for georgia.. i had to leave early at 8 with DA....................i got home at TEN. but overall.. that was a really really chill day that i really needed.
WHOA, hangout today again? Well, after Kathlene's party.. she wasn't yet satisfied cause her birthday lasts a WEEK HAHA, so we went out downtown with angelo.. cause everyone else was so busy or too tired from the day before that they didn't want to hang.. so it was really last minute. I ended up with a AA skirt.. and unfortunately, kathlene didn't get anything cause the sizes were either too big for chester or too small for her :( There was a windbreaker that she wanted that was XS.. AND FRIIIIIIICK IT WAS SOOOOOOOOOOOO FREAKING NICE.. i was going to buy it.. BUT SINCE i spent 35 bucks on my skirt with my deb card... i apparently "exceeded my limit" on my card! AND THAT WAS THE LAST WINDBREAKER OF THAT KIND IN VANCOUVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND IT WAS ON SALE FOR 70!!!!!!!!!!!! OMFG. THIS SETTLES FOR A BILLION exclamation points :( :(
other than that.. it was better to be outside than waste a perfectly nice day inside!
p.s. i know who you are, i'm not classified in your stupid act. p.p.s. you can't be THAT oblivious to whatever reason you're looking for.
ayy babbyyy call you later <3>
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date/time Thursday, May 21, 2009,5:54 PM
He prayed for a "good day."
1. Tomeia puts sanitizer in my hair..AGAIN. 2. Ren puts CHEWED grapes in my bag. 3. Elizer blows a ketchup chip bag in my face resulting in crumbs flying into my eyes. 4. Chester stole my LAST pencil out of the other 10 that he's lost.
:(lumsy.
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date/time 5:48 PM
IMMURED.
how do you recapture the unconditional love of yourself for someone else.. is it the imperfections that enable you to see perfectly? is it the badinage that fakes a play-hard-to-get act?
for whatever reason that i can't think of, there are plenty of reasons to let go of already ended love.
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date/time Wednesday, May 20, 2009,5:11 PM
bestfriend?
you told me "i personally think she's a bad influence to me."
huhhh...
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date/time Sunday, May 17, 2009,11:06 AM
keep it HOOD.
uggghhhh, i'm SOO full from dimsum this morning.
HAHAHA so yesterday was a really good day. The weather was so perfect, it wasn't super sunny, but sunny enough to wear short shorts and a tee. Unfortunately, Jache said it might be cold, so i changed into skinnies with a wisdom crewneck.. and five minutes to walking outside to the bus stop.. it got SOO HOT. I love this weather [: even today.. it's really nice outside.. but i'm stuck reading my new sequel book, which is good enough. So i left with my sister and Jache to RC but i got off near chapters to get my book. I didn't want to go home right away, SOO.. since Tomeia was in richmond.. we met up at RC at 4 and went downtown. HAHA a day with Tomeia is better than playland. We tried so many things on in Urban Outfitters, and i ended up with a striped dress which i really wanted to buy, if they weren't 58 and 29 bucks cause they both actually had xxs. After trying on Tomeia's last dress, i didn't buy anything but since she got toothpaste on her black shirt, she grabbed a pink flowy dress shirt. We walked to Cafe Crepe right after and ate SOO MUCH. At 6:30, we bussed back and on the bus, there was this REALLY strong herbal minty smell and we were trying to figure out who it was. And Tomeia, being Tomeia, went behind this lady who was standing up beside us and she put her nose SUPER close to the lady and kept smelling her HAHAHAH omfgg. OH and Tomeia thinks the pastence of hide is hood HAHAHAHAHAHAHA <3 i ended up with that ^ from urban outiftters :| (the top) The day before? consisted of bussing home with DA (:, watching the VERY last episode of Prison Break(L) with Jache, and Julio, Pat and Mike playing violin in my room. GOOD WEEEK!
peace, love & lmfao.
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date/time Saturday, May 16, 2009,2:11 PM
You're like a car wreck on a highway.
Everyone knows what happened. Everyones stops and stares. But no one bothers to help out, Because quite frankly, no one cares. The mess has been left unclean, so wrap it up and date the scene. you have too much love, to put up with that shit.
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date/time 1:34 PM
BEST WEEK OF MY LIFE.
THE SEQUEL TO The Summoning By Kelley Armstrong WAS ALREADY RELEASED AND I TOTALLY FORGOT. I've been waiting eversince i finished The Summoning, during the December Christmas break. After the first book, i seriously could not wait to start reading the sequel. When i finished The Summoning, i found out the sequel comes out in May 2009 AND OMFG.. IT'S OUT. The moment i remembered, i did the honours of actually calling chapters and putting it on hold. HAHA Yes, i like reading. (:
For 2 days or more.. I'll be M.I.A. since i'm a really slow reader.
thank you (L)
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date/time Friday, May 15, 2009,7:31 PM
SLIP AWAY.
there are so many good things that happen between you and someone else, and you'll want to keep those things as a memory.....but when one really bad thing happens between you two, as much as you'll want to forget the good things.. you just can't let go. that's why you can't let go of people you loved, ever, they'll always be a memory.. and as much as you fight for those good things to happen again thinking things can go back to the way they were, you know it'll never work as much as you pretend that they will. all you can do is make sure that you don't live in the past.. and unfortunately, that's reality.
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date/time Thursday, May 14, 2009,5:20 PM
THAT'S NOT MY NAAAAAME.
i can't sleep without wearing a hair tie on my wrist and 4 pillows. whoa, so many things are going on.. i have to write this quickly cause i have gayass vio in 10 minutes.. and my mom's been telling me i can quit and when i ask her if i can, she starts spazzing an all that blah blah blah. oh ENGLISH, was horrible, i'm sorry denzel for cutting you off three lines and i'm sorry for being so shy in the beginning.. i feel like doing it again on tuesday HAHA.
oh and btw, i actually felt like we were those inseperable two again today.. it seemed so perfect this morning.. no shit i miss it, but with what people recently told me? i don't know if i should.....
KATHLENE! i'm sorry for getting you sick.. but i guess that somewhat saved you from the English Play for another .. 5 days ? haha my bad.
R&B is starting to sound the same AGAIN. going slowly back to lenka and all that few month ago kind of music. i miss it.
OH, i like my brown hair (: no more erika looking lg hair.. >:|
i can't get science off my mind.. i don't know why but it's killing me and eating at my limited amount of security..
p.s. i'm not obsessed. at all.
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date/time Tuesday, May 12, 2009,9:41 PM
currently feels like shit.
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date/time 9:57 AM
:(
i went to school yesterday only to go to science which was third block so that i could find out what my mark was for the test.. and i don't want to talk about it ever again, cause i am a fail in life :( to add more to that, i had to go in and out of my three classes just to blow my nose cause i'm seriously sick.. swine flu? what a waste of tissues and energy 3
SO TODAY, i wake up.. wanting to go to school so that i can go to B block to practice for our Shakespeare plays, but my dad won't even let me go to school.. and it's somewhat sunny outside :( so i've been left by everyone in the house, including Chiclet who is M.I.A. and doesn't want to go near me. But the parentals promised to get some movies to prevent my borophobia :|
HAHA, i finally watched the "how can she slap" vid, and it wouldvn't been funny if the guys didn't say it. woooh........
peace, love & lmfao :(
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date/time Sunday, May 10, 2009,9:25 PM
behind those walls.
you'll never know until you climb over. you'll get over, once you get through. and only then.. you'll realize.. "damn, i don't need this bs."
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date/time 9:23 PM
princess?
guess what.. my gown is a thick white blanket my thrown is a mound of pillows my candy is sweet tylenol my liquid jewellery is water.
.. i'm sick :(
p.s. no G-ration in a while p.p.s. then get high.
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date/time 2:03 PM
you've got me lifted.
this day started off so well, and it's still going.. woke up at 8 to greet my mom.. HAPPY MOTHERSDAY! then to mass, which followed with helping out at pancake breakfast at st. pauls. FINALLY completed my service hours (: 1. with every consequence comes a benefit.. and this experience with my mom just shows the amount of negativity i deserve when i intentionally do something wrong.
2. i miss you, and i love how we don't see each other in forever but when we do see each other, we're like best friends.. and can tell each other EVERYTHING that's going on completely losing track of time and laugh about it all. you've taught me a lot through our ups and plenty of downs, and i love you for everything that we've been through. this 9 year friendship will last forever. those lame elementary scholastic bought bff books and stickers really did mean what they were meant for.
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date/time 1:46 PM
you don't move on, you move forward.
-1000 below shakesperian times. (when you don't understand what they're saying but it makes total sense) ..
" i look through a fool's eyes. yet not a lover as clever as me, to think one loves the other so seperately. "
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date/time Friday, May 8, 2009,7:51 PM
G-RATE.
ks23u. LOL, how LG & LB. today was a good day (: except for the fact that my mom didn't go to my mother's day mass :( other than that.. haha G-rating the world makes it all the more x847938473294 better. [:
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date/time Thursday, May 7, 2009,9:34 PM
i won't be here waiting.
i think it ain't healthy for me to
judge you by your flaws,
and that's why, no i could critisize, but i put that aside to focus on you and i.
if you believe, you'll do best without me.
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date/time 8:04 PM
NOTE TO SELF.
never sing your heart out in the shower again. HAH.. fmylife.com
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date/time 8:03 PM
you break it, you buy it.
haha my heart's not worth the loose change you've lost..
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date/time Tuesday, May 5, 2009,8:12 PM
AGAIN?!
Ha-ha, you just don't learn.
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date/time Sunday, May 3, 2009,8:22 PM
it's my birthday, bitch. (:
when i'm with you, i forget all the bullshit.and i needed that today, so i was with you. with you, when i'm with you, i feel like a bird (: HAHA. thank you for one of the best birthdays ever. ( L )
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date/time Saturday, May 2, 2009,10:05 AM
in my notebook..
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date/time 9:35 AM
8 letters, 1 word.
BULLSHIT. haha [: anyhoo..remember this? (i changed it a bit)
what good is my heart, if it doesn't belong to you? I've never been so sure in my life, that you're the one for me.
But you've twisted lids, and our love can never be new..
So, i'm back and i've found someone that'll love me more.
And now i've been falling for you..
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date/time Friday, May 1, 2009,6:39 PM
showers of kisses.
I'm missing out on "the sunniest and best day of this year so far," and it's because of my mistakes, which make me feel like crap. But, the positives.. there are those few things still alive that make me happy. :) :)
Uphill: 1. PRISON BREAK. 2. wasn't lonely in detention 3. chrisette michele 4. the new handsanitizers in the hallway HAHA ..our school attempting to prove that we aren't ghetto.. and for the swine flu.
Downhill: 1. fell asleep in socials :( 2. MIA in the sun. 3. sneezing 10 times in less than a minute.
p.s. imy.
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music
it's hard for me to pretend.
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Profile
I'm Chelsea.
"wish that it was a perfect world where you could just forgive and forget; but you kind of learn that if someone loses your trust, you have to help them grow too, by giving them the consequence of 'letting them go and moving on..' it's hard to let someone go, but at the same time if you really love them, you're going to teach them what's right. love is selfless."
don't like what you see? try ALT + F4.
disclaim your rules
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